Have you ever wanted something that you could never, ever have? Something that nothing short of a scientific miracle and controlled substances could hope to bring you?
Give me a moment while I heave a sigh.
We won't go into that today. But this, too is something I can never have:
Look at Anne Brontë's snarl! Boomerang book-throwing action! The Brontësaurus! The Brontësaurus.
And it is all a fake. These Brontë sisters will never be.
I suppose I will just have to settle for a Charles Dickens action figure for $8.95 through Archie McPhee. But how will that teach me to use my brain and make history?